Sonic & All-Stars Racing Transformed

Because I feel like writing an essay.

How we doing? Are we well? I'm back to complain about Sonic & All-Stars Racing Transformed, because there are points to prove and potentially more than one person to please. You may remember its predecessor - a lovable-if-often-underwhelming escapade lacking in scope. Well good news - the trend continues!

Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker

Can you tell I've got a job yet

Time to conclude these solid, high definition gears of metal with Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker. This one was a PSP game - that's a fine recipe for success on the big screen I'm sure.

Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater

Apparently I was the only human being oblivious of Metal Gear Solid 3's existence when it was released. "It's the bestest PlayStation 2 game ever", said the press, "look at those green and brown textures, aren't they hip and rad?!".

Sure looks "hip and rad" to me... if you've never seen video game graphics before. Anyway here we go with part two of whatever - 2004's Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater, the modern "HD" version for modern "HD" people.

Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty

Here's a franchise I've not bothered with - Metal Gear. And what better way to get acquainted with this nest of snakes than with Metal Gear Solid HD Collection, released back in late 2011 for Xboxes and PlayStations?

...actually I suppose the 1998 PlayStation release of Metal Gear Solid would be a better idea, but hey, here's the next best thing - Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty, thrown at PlayStation 2 owners in late 2001. I can't wait to save the day as Solid Snake!

Star Wars Pinball

"NO DISINTERGRATIONS"

Yes Star Wars Pinball, another arm of the ever-growing Disney empire in the form of balls and flippers. 800 Microsoft Points gets you 25% fewer tables than normal, but hey, it's Star Wars, and we all like Star Wars... provided you don't mention the special editions, prequels, DVD, 3D or Blu Ray releases, Clone Wars, the bizarre Christmas special and this paragraph isn't working so well is it.

Pinball FX 2: V12

And to think, we got the abysmal Speed Machine instead.

Yes our tales of classic Zen Classics pinballing wonder come to a close with V12, the engine which helped us win the war, and... isn't associated with classic American musclecars. Redraw your artwork!

Borderlands

Quick one.

Borderlands, the FPS/"Action RPG" crossover that was all the rage back in 2009 (and most of RAGE in 2011). The world likes this one. I don't.

Pinball FX 2: Tesla

Now where were we - oh yes, Pinball FX 2's Zen Classics collection, because I hate to leave a job half done regardless of how much I regret the undertaking. And here's a table based on the life and times of Nikola Tesla, because... erm... Heinrich Hertz sucks or something.

Retro City Rampage

But MDA cards can't do graphics!!

Retro City Rampage by Vblank Entertainment, here to teach us some important life lessons, such as why you shouldn't delay a game for countless months, and why GTA III on the NES might have been a more worthwhile project than creating a downloadable XBLA parody. Clearly a bastion of learning - we should be honoured to be in its presence.

Forza Motorsport 3

"The definitive racing game of this generation".

Forza Motorsport 3, because life is full of surprises. Released in 2009 by Turn 10 for the Xbox 360, it's the definitive racing game of this generation and it's the definitive racing game of this generation. Old E3 quotes are fun.

Driver: San Francisco

Well isn't this a staple of originality.

Driver: San Francisco, built up the road by Ubisoft Reflections and released back in 2011. The most imaginative city in the world plays host to a super successful video game franchise - it's sarcasm overload, but could it secretly be a great game?

Pinball FX 2: El Dorado

I was told, from clearly unreliable sources, that El Dorado was one of the lesser tables to grace Zen Pinball in 2009. And that's why you don't listen to what people have to say. Opinions suck - more guns in schools!!!

Pinball FX 2: Shaman

Hey look, it's the day nobody was waiting for - equality amongst pinball simulators by Zen Studios.

Shaman, El Dorado, Tesla and V12, four pinball tables from 2009 originally exclusive to PlayStation 3 users, are now available to Xbox 360 fans via Pinball FX 2. Trying to describe the situation hurts my head, but I'm going to review each table individually anyway because I can, starting with Shaman... right now.

Pinball FX 2: Civil War

Time to put your PhD to good use.

Politics, pinball and Marvel Comics, all rolled up into one bundle in the form of Civil War, recently released to Pinball FX 2. Chose your coloured gimp and manipulate the powers at be. Sounds lovely.

Sega Bass Fishing

The frightening tales of Dreamcast Collection for the Xbox 360 come to a close with Sega Bass Fishing, the game everybody wanted.

Space Channel 5: Part 2

Hey there space cats, this is Squirrel coming to you live with Space Channel 5: Part 2, third game in "Dreamcast" Collection for the Xbox 360. Why not part 1? Because that would make too much damned sense.

Crazy Taxi

Because this blog needs more Dreamcast games. Even if this isn't one of them.

Craaazy Taxi, part two of our wonderful journey through half-hearted Sega compilations. I made some crazy money once - I had a £5 note which set a bin on fire with no regard for human safety. What am I typing.

Sonic Adventure

Blog Squirrel, home of obscure games.

I have in my possession a copy of Dreamcast Collection for the Xbox 360. Why this was given to me considering my fairly hefty library of real Dreamcast games is anybody's guess, but here we are, and here's the first game of the pack, the lovely Sonic Adventure, first released to Xbox Live in 2010.

Nail'd

Over the months and years I've had tons of fun picking apart critically acclaimed games to find that they're not too great. Or at least I think that qualifies as fun... I'm not entirely sure.

But hey, here's critically "mixed" game, so I guess that means that once I've picked it apart, it'll be horrible. Nail'd for the Xbox 360, because we need to omit the "e" - that's obvious.

Pinball FX 2: Plants vs. Zombies

Something current on Blog Squirrel? Better get that third runway up and running because the pigs want to fly.

Satire. And yes, I've decided to embark on individual Pinball FX 2/Zen Pinball table review(s), because outdated thoughts from mid-2011 scarcely apply to content released in recent days. This is the Plants vs. Zombies table, which deserves a mention because it breaks established norms by not being outstanding. Oh no.